cryhaver:

@ young gay girls one of the biggest lies about being gay the media / your surroundings will tell you is that people who are gay are always 100% sure about their identity. In today’s society, being out is still highly dangerous for many people, and so you’ll find that people rarely come out until they are VERY SURE that they are not straight. Gay figures in the media must think intensely for years about what they are willing to sacrifice to be out, and are thus either very sure before they do so, or at least are committed to stand by their label for life because of how hostile society is. 

The truth is: the struggle you feel is natural. It is something many, if not most gay people go through. The fact that you are not sure does not mean you are wrong or you are coming into your identity in a wrong way. The fact that you are not always confident in your chosen label while you find yourself is not wrong or uncommon. The fact that you’re ‘afraid you’re just straight’ at times is not bad or invalidating. Forging an identity for yourself as non-straight is a difficult process and to have all your hard work threatened by feelings of invalidity is scary. 

You probably think that all or at least “the good” gay people are always completely sure of themselves, and always were sure of themselves. This is simply not true. Your experience is not just valid, but something that many gay people go through. You do not feel this way because you are “forcing” or “faking” your identity. Growing up gay is difficult, and you are going through it in the way most of us do and you are in great company.  

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